"My people have committed two sins: They have forsaken me, the spring of living water, and have dug their own cisterns, broken cisterns that cannot hold water"
- Jeremiah 2:13
I thought if I'm already a devoted Christian everything is now under control. I didn't thought of loosing God in my hand. I always worship Him, reads the bible and share my experiences of Him to others. Everything was fine but when trouble came I trembled and ask God why? My faith seems to pull back and I got nothing else to go. I lose hold of the time and was always anxious then suddenly despair, disappointment came to me bothering. I prayed and asked God for help but He didn't respond I didn't expect that would happen. The only thing I've asked is "God but why?"
After reading "God is there in tough times" by Ed Hindson everything changed. I didn't bought it purposely but when I came to Aileen's house that's the book that I got interested. There's a lot of books there but it seems that it chose me. She sell books so she sold it to me for only P100. Reading it changed my perspective about God not only that problems are opportunities, and it can make our relationship with God better but it also reminds me of these verse "My people have committed two sins: They have forsaken me, the spring of living water, and have dug their own cisterns, broken cisterns that cannot hold water" from Jeremiah 2:13. Knocking at my door this idea came to me. I threw God once by throwing the spring of living water that He has given to me the time when I received Him. Unconsciously, I did throw Him by prioritizing things that are worldly. And exchange Him to a broken cistern I made and fill it up with water that drains. This water that I tried to supplement are worldly. I fill my broken cistern by things that I thought could make me happy. Things that will never bring Him glory. These are the things that brings a part-time happiness to me as a human being, My cellphone, books, friends, family, money, gifts, instruments and other things. These things are worldly. True, that God wanted us to be happy but the happiness that He wanted for us is joy. Joy that can only felt from Him. This joy could only be found from the "spring of living water" I had thrown before. You may fill your broken cistern with water that bring happiness but it will not last long. This what happened to me filling my broken cistern with water that drains to make myself happy I kept of filling my broken cistern with water that kept on draining. I kept on filling it until nothing was left to fill it. The Joy He can give is eternal. It can only be felt by prioritizing only Him. Giving glory, serving and honoring Him will give me eternal joy. That's the Joy God wanted me to feel. Water that I fill in the broken cistern may drain. But if I have the spring of the living water I never felt sorrow, pain, disappointment or even abandonment because the joy that I felt is by giving glory to God. Giving glory to Him will give me so much joy. And that what God wanted.
Now I know that even devoted Christians could lose grip of Him by exchanging Him to broken cistern that cannot hold water. God never abandoned me I did! I exchanged Him with broken cistern so I can fill my own happiness to it. But I must not trust my happiness by myself. It must be trusted to the source of happiness God. He cannot only give you happiness but He can give you more than that, joy. Happiness is not about worldly things but its about being at peace with God. And that gives me Joy.
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